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The Day I ... Couldn't Fall Back Asleep

Writer's picture: CM FrancisCM Francis

Most of the time, I'm an optimist, but not today.





I woke up at 1:30 am wide awake. My head started spinning, around and around and around with questions, concerns, and frustration points. How am I going to pay rent this month? How am I going to pay my proof editor? How come my leg isn't working properly? When am I going to format my book? Why isn't One Term Left as good as I thought it was? Am I going to have a seizure with all this stress? How do I become more social media aware?


The list goes on and on and on.


Around two in the morning, I gave up on sleeping and decided to conquer that long list of worries. Even now, as I write a list of complaints, I feel somewhat calmer, my blood pres


sure and heart rate going down.


I made a cup of Keurig, put on Gilmore Girls as background noise, and started to do the final touches on One Term Left. Surprisingly, it only took me three hours. After I ate a great breakfast and took a two-hour nap (along with Peaches next to me), I was ready to tackle the formatting portion of my list.


At first, I tried to use my laptop, but it wouldn't work. I went into the game room to use my boyfriend's computer with two screens... TWO SCREENS! I found a person via YouTube and followed her instructions on how to format a book (I kid you not, I literally Googled it). Two hours later, it wasn't too bad. I was able to fix the margins, the size, and page layout. However, this is where the "easy" thing turns into "hard."



The titles kept getting chopped off.

The footers wouldn't cooperate.

And the font looked, well, sloppy.


This was when I grow frustrated. Not only was I running on a lack of sleep, I am having doubts about myself. Why don't I have more followers? Why don't I have more money? Why me? I thought beating the brain aneurysm was the hardest thing, but it wasn't; it was everything else following.


So, I wrote this blog just to spill my guts out. I sent my formatted manuscript to my best friend because she's a miracle worker and she's done this before. Now, for the rest of the day, I'm putting One Term Left on the back-burner and let inspiration hit me for Black Hole Symphony.



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